I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
