Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
