fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
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