We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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