I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Can't talk, ducks in the car
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
