Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down

(920): View more from Wisconsin

wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?

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(518): View more from New York

I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide

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(256): View more from Alabama

Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....

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(661): View more from California

Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.

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(586): View more from Michigan

The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule

(856): View more from New Jersey

Lmao sorry

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(317): View more from Indiana

it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.

(1-317): View more from Indiana

On my way

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(480): View more from Arizona

Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail

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(813): View more from Florida

All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.

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