just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
