i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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