eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
that is very illegal...i love you.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
