come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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