i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
