Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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