Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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