can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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