her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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