Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
