i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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