That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
My dick has a subreddit
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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