I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
