why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
