he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
