recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
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