Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
