rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
