They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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