I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
