my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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