2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
