and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
i out mim tonsoeep
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