He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
