There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize
