My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
