Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
