I wish i was in the wii world.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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