whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
