He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
