hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
