so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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