Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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