Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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