Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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