The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
