Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Randomize
