awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
