I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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