i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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