U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Walk of Shame today included voting.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
