I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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