More tranny stories later!
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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