Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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